I think I'll call him Alex...

Why am I making a post at 1:53 in the morning? Because I'm VERY AWAKE RIGHT NOW.

Since all of us are kinda sick, we've been having problems with our sleep schedules in Casa del Pierce. And then I went and screwed things up even MORE by offering to drive Nani & Freak to the airport, which meant getting up at 3am yesterday.

So tonight Molly and I stayed in the living room to watch movies while Crystal attempts to sleep. It was about 1am the last time I remember being awake, because eventually I woke-up with Molly asleep in my arms and the sound of our stupid cats in the kitchen trying to break in to The Cat Food Bin because I had forgotten to feed them before passing out. Stupid, stupid cats.

I lay Molly down on the couch and I go to feed the Stupid Cats.

Only there aren't any cats in the Kitchen.

What *is* in the kitchen is a great big RACCOON, joyously eating up all the cat food. He wasn't scarred at al; he just looked up at me as if to say "Hey" before going back to the eating.

"Hey there, uhm... Raccoon. Alex. I think I'll call you Alex. Hey, uhm... Alex?"

"Yo?"

"Alex, I don't know how to really bring this up but, uhm, well... that's not your food."

"Oh? I didn't see any name on it so I figured it was for everybody. But if you'd rather that I not..."

"Well see, Alex, the thing is that this isn't your home, either. See, you're kinda what we'd like to call a 'Woodland Creature'"

"Oh, I see... I think I know where this is going..."

"Yeah, so if you wouldn't mind terribly, would you mind making a break for the pet door as if I had startled you or something?"

"Oh, sure, sure! I can totally respect that! Let me just... ugh! Tight fit! But... there. I'm out. Is it okay if I just hang here for a while till you fall asleep again, then come back in and finish eating?"

"NO, ALEX! I would prefer that you stay OUTSIDE from now on! You're a RACCOON! You probably have RABIES or something!"

"Dude, harsh. I never pegged you for a Racist."

And with that, Alex left.

As i hunted for a way to secure the pet door and keep it closed, Alex kept poking his nose in through the little door.

"Dude, we're still Bros, right?"

"ALEX GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW I MEAN IT!!!"

"Okay, i understand. You're tense. I'll come back later."

This was a much more relaxed wildlife encounter than I had ever expected. Back on The Farm, critters knew to be afeared of humans. Just rattling the doorknob was enough to send them scattering to the far corners of the night. But even as I was swatting at Alex with a broom and throwing things at him to get him off our patio, he kept looking at me like I had seriously hurt his feelings. Big, soulful puppydog eyes :(

Now The Cats are pissed that they can't come and go as they please. They are currently digging at my pet door barricade in hopes that I'll just let them come and go as they please once again. Fat chance, at least not tonight. They can go ahead and stay outside with Alex and talk about what a dick of a room mate I am.

Disaster & Parental Failure

Today I am an absolute failure of a parent. Molly woke up a little bit sicker than she ahd been the past few days (lots of snot, sneezing and coughing), but I had been promising her an awesome day out today. We were going to go to Lynndale Park in Lynnwood for a nifty little juggling show and then playing with bjorker and Aurelia. She was stoked to do this, and so was I!

First bad sign was that all the roads I knew of to get to Lynndale Park were closed for construction. Spent a half-hour following detour signs that took us further and further away from the park... I eventually cheated and cut through the construction to get to a little-used parking lot that was right on top of the area where the juggling was gonna happen.

Then it started to rain. Not hard, just enough to let you know that it's raining. Just enough to make Molly insist that we take an umbrella with us.

The first ten minutes there were great. We found Aurelia, we sat, she shared her umbrella, they blew bubbles... it was nice.

Then Molly got bored.

She stripped off her coat, shoes and socks. I *think* she beat Aurelia with the umbrella and refused to say she was sorry. And then she decided to give up on the jugglers and head for the playground, shoeless, in the rain.

Every time I tried to play with her or talk to her or even look in her general direction she yelled at me to stop it, even when she was asking me for help.

Once she was nice and dirty, we went back to the jugglers. Molly found a stick and made sure the other girls had them too so they could all swing them around and hit each other with them. Molly refused to stop, I took her stick away, she burst out crying.

Then she became very interested in the jugglers. So did I... they brought out KNIVES.

And then Molly was GONE. She had run off the to the playground on her own in the 7 seconds that I didn't stay 100% completely focused on her, one of my biggest fears.

She played int he playground and continued to tell me to quit it, so I told her that I had had enough of her attitude and in to the car seat we wnet, crying all the way.

On the way home I bought her a Happy Meal just to shut her up for a few minutes. I was THAT FRUSTRATED.

I feel like the worst Father in the world right now :(