Predictive (Sales) Text

BEHOLD IN WONDERMENT AS I PREDICT THE FUTURE, NOT WITH LIES AND TRICKERY BUT THROUGH THE PURE AND SCIENTIFIC PROCESS OF DEDUCTIVE REASONING! Observe the progression of Advertising E-Mail Header Lines that I have received starting a week before Thanksgiving:

• Black Friday Deals Start NOW!
  
• Why wait till Black Friday? Lowest prices of the year RIGHT NOW!
  
• Black Friday starts Thursday at 8pm!
  
• Better-Than-Black-Friday Prices a day early!
  
• DON'T MISS THESE BLACK FRIDAY DOOR BUSTER LOWEST PRICES OF THE YEAR!
  
• Cyber Monday Deals start NOW! Lowest prices of the year!
  
  Based upon this pattern, I can confidently predict that starting on Tuesday, the header lines will be reading "Cyber Monday Sales All Week Long" and, of course, "Screw Black Friday, THESE are the best prices of the year! No, REALLY! We swear!"

"Christmas isn't even Christian!"

I'm sure you've heard your enlightened friends go on and on about how Christmas isn't even really Christian - how Jesus wasn't born on December 25th, decorating trees is a Druid thing, and most every Christmas Tradition has been borrowed, copied or stolen from some other religion.

I'm an Atheist, sure, and I think that this observation probably started from an Atheist... but I'd really like that to stop please.

The Christians took all that stuff from all the other religions and smooshed it all together in to something that's really great! If your first response is to take it apart, that's...

...That's like saying "Ugh that Cake isn't even really a Cake! It's just some flour, eggs and milk stirred together and baked till light and fluffy, then they slapped some frosting on it! Heck, even the FROSTING is just powdered sugar and milk!"

So I'd like to see credit given where credit is due. Thanks, Christianity, for making my favorite Holiday! I appreciate it!