I can see the Infomercial now...

[captain_slinky]

Do you love Ice Cream Cones? Sure, we all do! But who has time for all that messy licking? The constant hassle of turning and painfull rotating of the cone? The continuous 360-degree monitoring of ALL sides of the ice cream to make sure no one side is getting too melty? What a MESS! It's enough to make ANYBODY - yes, even *you*, Tubby - want to give up and eat a salad instead.

But WAIT! There's HOPE!