152 - Still Crying One Year Later
Aug. 11th, 2015 10:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
captain_slinkyI stayed up till just past midnight last night, worried about how I was going to react today. I'm a very emotional guy, and I love all my feelings equally - I enjoy crying in the same way I enjoy laughing because it means that there is a deeper, uncontrollable level underneath all the social conformity that can still take over despite a lifetime of conditioning. Beneath all these layers of "Well you shouldn't do that" and "That's not appropriate" rules, there's a real human who isn't afraid to burst through all that stuff and yell "FARTS ARE FUNNY!" or "DEATH IS SAD!"
The movie "Inside Out" - Wow. They really nailed it with that flick, didn't they? In the process of making a kids movie, they've also provided us with an emotional Rosetta Stone that can be used for explaining how you feel about stuff and have others understand it.
So today is the one-year anniversary of Robin William's death, an event that hit me HARD. Like, every bit as hard as when my Dad died, and I spent a lot of time trying to figure out why that was, and in the end I figured it out, but that might be a post for a different day.
JOY is running around my head trying to show all the other emotions all the fun, happy memories of Robin Williams - including the "Oh My God is that Robin Williams?" moment when I realized that I was looking at Magic The Gathering singles at the same shop where Robin Williams was shopping for Warhammer minis!
DISGUST keeps reminding me of all the mediocre movies he made, and how I jumped right on the "Robin Williams Is A Washed-Up Joke" bandwagon in the late-90's. She's also reminding ANGER that Robin committed suicide, how lame.
ANGER then just LOSES IT. He's angry about the suicide, sure, but he's also angry because of the reasons behind the suicide - it wasn't depression or a cry for help, it was an attempt to keep his family (and the world) from having to see him become someone that he never was and pity him for it. ANGER is angry because... because he kind of agrees with it.
FEAR is afraid that ANGER agrees with it, and fears the day when I might have to make a decision like this, because he knows that Robin's FEAR was at the console when he died. FEAR also fears what people will think when they read this. There's NO WAY he's going near the control panel!
SADNESS has taken over at the control panel. JOY keeps bringing her movie clips, and SADNESS just keeps touching them and turning them blue without even really looking at them. SADNESS is the only one who's okay to drive this thing right now - JOY is overworked, DISGUST "Can't Even" right now, ANGER is too angry at himself, FEAR is afraid of what would happen if he says anything...
Lucky for me, Bing-Bong said "Hey Kiddo! Let's write about it! Get it out there! That always feels great, right? Then we'll go build another lamp! I've got an idea for one with an astronaut in a convertible..."
The movie "Inside Out" - Wow. They really nailed it with that flick, didn't they? In the process of making a kids movie, they've also provided us with an emotional Rosetta Stone that can be used for explaining how you feel about stuff and have others understand it.
So today is the one-year anniversary of Robin William's death, an event that hit me HARD. Like, every bit as hard as when my Dad died, and I spent a lot of time trying to figure out why that was, and in the end I figured it out, but that might be a post for a different day.
JOY is running around my head trying to show all the other emotions all the fun, happy memories of Robin Williams - including the "Oh My God is that Robin Williams?" moment when I realized that I was looking at Magic The Gathering singles at the same shop where Robin Williams was shopping for Warhammer minis!
DISGUST keeps reminding me of all the mediocre movies he made, and how I jumped right on the "Robin Williams Is A Washed-Up Joke" bandwagon in the late-90's. She's also reminding ANGER that Robin committed suicide, how lame.
ANGER then just LOSES IT. He's angry about the suicide, sure, but he's also angry because of the reasons behind the suicide - it wasn't depression or a cry for help, it was an attempt to keep his family (and the world) from having to see him become someone that he never was and pity him for it. ANGER is angry because... because he kind of agrees with it.
FEAR is afraid that ANGER agrees with it, and fears the day when I might have to make a decision like this, because he knows that Robin's FEAR was at the console when he died. FEAR also fears what people will think when they read this. There's NO WAY he's going near the control panel!
SADNESS has taken over at the control panel. JOY keeps bringing her movie clips, and SADNESS just keeps touching them and turning them blue without even really looking at them. SADNESS is the only one who's okay to drive this thing right now - JOY is overworked, DISGUST "Can't Even" right now, ANGER is too angry at himself, FEAR is afraid of what would happen if he says anything...
Lucky for me, Bing-Bong said "Hey Kiddo! Let's write about it! Get it out there! That always feels great, right? Then we'll go build another lamp! I've got an idea for one with an astronaut in a convertible..."
