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We had my brother's girls (Haley and Hannah) spend the night with us Saturday night.

Haley, age 8, blonde hair, is a very cool/smart little girl. Crystal taught her to play Magic: The Gathering, and we had many good discussions that showed she has very good taste and judgement. When we took the girls to The Creation Station (a local craft shop that lets you build anything using all their stuff for $5) Haley made this incredible squid-like robot with piercing blue eyes and a patchwork skin of cloth scrtaps that reminded me of Silenc Of The Lambs. Haley is very introspective, likes to read books, wear comfortable clothes, and has a wicked-dark sense of humor and sarcasm that makes me proud to call her my niece.

Hannah, Age 4, is... well... what can you say nice about Hannah? I can honestly say that she is not currently setting any living things on fire. No, i take that back... I can't actually *see* her right now, so I have no way of knowing for sure. She is The Devil, taken the form of a cute little red-headed girl. She chased our cats around the house with a Yo-Yo (that she had tied the string of in to a Hangman's Noose somehow) saying "Heeeeere kitty kitty!" in a voice that will surely give me nightmares for a solid week. At one point, we had put her in a chair for a 5-minute "Time Out", and I sat with her in what was supposed to be silence. The just scowled at me and said "Git". I ignored her. Her look turned more serious, then she said it again: "Git". I continued to ignore her, so she expanded her vocabulary: "Git OUT." I told her to be quiet, she told me I couldn't make her be quiet, I put my hand over her mouth. She cried. Shen Crystal came, her story was that I had punched her in the face.

"Really?"
"Well, no... but he put his hand on my mouth and it fould have got in my eye!"

She scowled at me for about 10 minutes after that, then she went on as if nothing had happened. Ready for her next trick, hittign her sister because it was "her turn".

Evil child.

Poor Slinky!

Date: 2003-08-18 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bghsmith.livejournal.com
There has to be at least ONE of those in every family, doesn't there?

Ours is cousin Mike. As a child he liked to physically torture all the girls. Even though he was older and bigger than all us.(Hit us, pin us on the ground, bend our arms back until they almost broke, etc. Not fun wrestling stuff, mean trying to cause pain stuff.)

As an adult he lies about how much money he makes and tries to make it sound like he's really smart and doing really well. In truth, EVERYONE that he talks down to (the females) makes more money then him and all have a college education. (He doesn't)

At least he lives way up there in the northwest now.

Re: Poor Slinky!

Date: 2003-08-18 03:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] captain-slinky.livejournal.com
I probably know him! Sadistic/masochistic chronic lier? Sounds like my Manager at my last job!

Date: 2003-08-18 04:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] freydis.livejournal.com
my 14 year old niece, though not evil, or the Devil (merely a minion of Beelzebub), will in fact end up on Girls Gone Wild. In about 4 years. And no, this doesn't make me happy.

Date: 2003-08-18 04:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] captain-slinky.livejournal.com
Ugh... yeah, that's Hannah all right! They must have been part of the same spawn-pool. See my most recent posting for more great stuff about Hannah that probably applies to your Beelze-Niece as well!

Date: 2003-08-18 05:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] freydis.livejournal.com
yeah, I read it. I laughed out loud. My brother asked what was so funny, I read him the "her sister has a college fund. Hannah has a bail and therapy fund"...My brother laughs and says "we should have probably started one of those for Becca.."..Becca being the GGW girl.

And people wonder why I still contemplate whether I really do want kids or not..

Date: 2003-08-18 05:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] captain-slinky.livejournal.com
I still want to have at least *one* kid, just to see if it's really that hard. I think with the proper upbringing, I can make my kid be one of the good ones! Besides, we already chose names! "Jonathan Archer Pierce" for a boy, and "Lorelie Belle Pierce" if it's a girl :)

Date: 2003-08-21 08:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] freydis.livejournal.com
I've got names. Well, I have 3 names, because I want 3 kids. Because I'm a masochist.
Riley Annette for my girl.
Oliver Micheal for my boy
Zoe Siobahn for my other girl.

I rule.
However, if I just have one child, it will be a girl, and her name will be Riley Annette. And if its a boy, I'll send him back for a refund.

Date: 2003-08-22 06:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] captain-slinky.livejournal.com
OLIVER!!! You know, I once based a religion on the character of Cousin Oliver from The Brady Bunch! If I could convince my woman that Oliver was a viable name, it would be there on the birth certificate! It's the least that a devout Cousin Olivarion such as my self can do!

Date: 2003-08-18 09:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deensey.livejournal.com
[insert local frat boys here]
HAN-NAH HAN-NAH HAN-NAH
[/local frat boy insert]

I'm sorry/

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