Cool, or creepy?

This year at the Emerald City Comic Con will be the first year that my niece, Brittany, will be bringing a Date with her (assuming that she and this boy are still dating at the time because I know how permanent these teenage flings can be and the longest she's ever dated a guy before was 2 weeks).

*IF* she is still bringing this fellow along to ECCC, it will be the first time that i get to meet him.

I am thinking that my introduction should go a little something like this:

"Hey, great to finally meet you! Since you *are* snogging and/or scrogging the woman who once was My Little Princess, I'm sure you'll understand that I'm predisposed towards disliking you. However, I look forward to having you attempt to win my respect and/or approval today! Who knows? This just might be the start of something wonderful! I just thought I'd let you know up-front EXACTLY where I stand, instead of letting you stew all day worrying about how Uncle Brian *really* feels about you. You can feel free to ask me for status updates any time you like and I promise to give you an honest assessment of the situation. If you ask for a status report and I don't respond? Assume that things are going poorly. And if you find that you're sitting here at the end of the day with no ride home? You can assume that I do not approve. So! having said all that... let's get out there and have some FUN!"