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I see what I did there...
Aug. 25th, 2014 10:14 amI'm looking for a Psychiatrist that's covered by our insurance, despite the machinations of Happy-Me.
Sad-Me agreed to go to my primary care physician and ask about Depression because Sad-Me was super-duper depressed, but then just 4 days before seeing the Doctor I suddenly "snapped out of it" and Happy-Me was back!
Happy-Me went to the Doctor anyways because it was my Annual Finger-In-The-Butt Check-Up Time anyways, figured I'd just *mention* that I had been depressed but WOW I SURE WASN'T DEPRESSED NOW!!! My mind, which had been a barren wasteland of apathy and nothingness while Sad-Me was in charge, was now FULL of ideas and thoughts and inklings that made Happy-Me bust out smiling and singing all day long! Why even bring up the whole "crippling depressive state" thing to my Doctor? Just go get a finger in my butt, a kiss n the cheek and be on my way!
But Sad-Me had promised that I would at least mention the Depression, and so I did.
Ends up, my Depression is/was SO BAD that they postponed my Finger-Butt Check-Up so we could more focus on the Depression. As Crystal put it, it's kind of like if I had gone in there for my annual check-up and hadn't even noticed that my arm had been cut off and was bleeding profusely. "I'm sorry, Mister Pierce, but we're really going to have to take care of that whole arm situation before we can put ANYTHING in your butt".
That's kind of terrifying to me, actually... that I walked in there with a condition bad enough to warrant the cancellation of my annual check-up, and to me it was just the way I've always lived.
The Doctor offered me some options despite my current upbeat Happy-Me persona, but most of all she urged me to see a Psychiatrist before we try *anything*, because she's just an MD and NOT a mental health professional. And so it was decided that I would make an appointment with a Psychiatrist.
That was on Wednesday.
Thursday, I was super-busy with a trip "Up North".
Friday and Saturday were spent over in Friday Harbor with my Sister.
Sunday was the last chance for Molly and I to have a Summer Stay-Up-All-Night night.
So here I am on Monday Morning, feeling great, making all sorts of plans to make and eat healthy food (Sad-Me would rather eat off the Dollar Menu even though it makes his whole body hurt to do so), exercise (Sad-Me really doesn't want to gather up all the stuff he needs to go to the gym), get the house cleaned up (Sad-Me doesn't mind eating cereal out of a frizbee if it means he doesn't have to unload the dishwasher) and SO MANY OTHER THINGS that would mean I have no time to call around and make an appointment to see a Psychiatrist -
Wait a minute... I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE, HAPPY-ME! I'm on to you!
We made a promise to Sad-Me and our friends and our family that we were going to get help! We promised The Ghost Of Robin WIlliams that we'd get help! I *will not* let you lie to Ecto-Mork!
And so I'm researching, typing on this entry while I wait for morning to come so I can call around...
(Forgot to hit "Post" before going to bed last night/this morning, and it's a goo thing - unposted Livejournal entry is a GREAT reminder of the decisions I made last night)!
Sad-Me agreed to go to my primary care physician and ask about Depression because Sad-Me was super-duper depressed, but then just 4 days before seeing the Doctor I suddenly "snapped out of it" and Happy-Me was back!
Happy-Me went to the Doctor anyways because it was my Annual Finger-In-The-Butt Check-Up Time anyways, figured I'd just *mention* that I had been depressed but WOW I SURE WASN'T DEPRESSED NOW!!! My mind, which had been a barren wasteland of apathy and nothingness while Sad-Me was in charge, was now FULL of ideas and thoughts and inklings that made Happy-Me bust out smiling and singing all day long! Why even bring up the whole "crippling depressive state" thing to my Doctor? Just go get a finger in my butt, a kiss n the cheek and be on my way!
But Sad-Me had promised that I would at least mention the Depression, and so I did.
Ends up, my Depression is/was SO BAD that they postponed my Finger-Butt Check-Up so we could more focus on the Depression. As Crystal put it, it's kind of like if I had gone in there for my annual check-up and hadn't even noticed that my arm had been cut off and was bleeding profusely. "I'm sorry, Mister Pierce, but we're really going to have to take care of that whole arm situation before we can put ANYTHING in your butt".
That's kind of terrifying to me, actually... that I walked in there with a condition bad enough to warrant the cancellation of my annual check-up, and to me it was just the way I've always lived.
The Doctor offered me some options despite my current upbeat Happy-Me persona, but most of all she urged me to see a Psychiatrist before we try *anything*, because she's just an MD and NOT a mental health professional. And so it was decided that I would make an appointment with a Psychiatrist.
That was on Wednesday.
Thursday, I was super-busy with a trip "Up North".
Friday and Saturday were spent over in Friday Harbor with my Sister.
Sunday was the last chance for Molly and I to have a Summer Stay-Up-All-Night night.
So here I am on Monday Morning, feeling great, making all sorts of plans to make and eat healthy food (Sad-Me would rather eat off the Dollar Menu even though it makes his whole body hurt to do so), exercise (Sad-Me really doesn't want to gather up all the stuff he needs to go to the gym), get the house cleaned up (Sad-Me doesn't mind eating cereal out of a frizbee if it means he doesn't have to unload the dishwasher) and SO MANY OTHER THINGS that would mean I have no time to call around and make an appointment to see a Psychiatrist -
Wait a minute... I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE, HAPPY-ME! I'm on to you!
We made a promise to Sad-Me and our friends and our family that we were going to get help! We promised The Ghost Of Robin WIlliams that we'd get help! I *will not* let you lie to Ecto-Mork!
And so I'm researching, typing on this entry while I wait for morning to come so I can call around...
(Forgot to hit "Post" before going to bed last night/this morning, and it's a goo thing - unposted Livejournal entry is a GREAT reminder of the decisions I made last night)!
