OH MY LORD IT'S REAL!!!

[captain_slinky]

It may not be a full pound of hamburger, ut there it is in all it's glory; a hamburger patty topped with cheese, grilled onions, 5 strips of bacon and nestled in a grilled Krispee Kreeme donut instead of a bun.

Legend of Luther Vandross' "The Luther" can be read here.

I have never been afraid of ANY type of food without having tried it at least once. The dreaded Fluffer-nutter Sandwich, Kimchee, Pickled Pigs Feet, raw oysters, any/all varieties of Sushi, tripple-fried-egg-chili-cheese-n-chutney sandwich... I've at least TRIED them all. But The Luther scares me in a way I've never been scared before!

I'm afraid that IF I were confronted with such a burger I would *know* that I SHOULDN'T eat it, but also know that I HAVE to eat it. Like if I don't eat it, I'll be missing out on a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!

It's like being offered sexual favors by your 18-year-old large-chested babysitter who is also a gymnast and a cheerleader. You're only gonna get this opportunity maybe ONCE in a lifetime! Should you risk your already great life and family for just one super-explosive incredible experience?

Maybe if I rent a hotel room with a kitchenette, I could make one during the day and eat it... no one would be the wiser!

Comments

[spazzychic.livejournal.com]

What's in the side dish? Salted Lard garnished with deep fried twinkie bits in a bacon alfredo pudding?

I fear the burger.

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

If the background information is correct, then the side dish should be either "Chitlins" or "Chicken Feet".

Ahh, Soul Food :)

[the-4th-doctor.livejournal.com]

I am, frankly, terrified.

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

I think I need to make a blog for my "Gastronomical House Of Horrors" which would include photo/video of me preparing AND eating the culinary freak show of sandwiches and burgers that would make mortal men quake in fear. Weird Al's "Twinkie Weiner Sandwich"... Elvis' deep-fired "Fluffer-Nutter"... the Red Dwarf "Tripple-Fried-Egg-Chilli-Cheese-N-Chutney" hangover remedy... I could get FAMOUS!

[the-4th-doctor.livejournal.com]

My roommate ate the the hot dog/twinkie thing once when he was in college. He said it was absolutely vile.

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

I can hardly wait!

[hallerlake.livejournal.com]

Somehow I expected the second sentence to be either "Once!" a la Johnny Dangerously, or the simpler but still apropos "He's dead now."

[the-4th-doctor.livejournal.com]

If he was dead I'd have a heck of a time explaining who was paying half the rent each month.

Well,

[bghsmith.livejournal.com]

You're welcome!

Re: Well,

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

Thank you?

Oh, for directing me to the community! Yes! Thank you!

Re: Well,

[bghsmith.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I saw the trouble you tried to get into over there. You'd think a bunch of fans of Boondocks wouldn't be so sensitive, but there you go!

Re: Well,

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

Thank goodness no one seems to be taking me seriously! 'Cuz Lord knows *I* certainly don't!