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captain_slinkyI had it licked. I had been nearly TWO YEARS "clean and sober". It *was* a habit that was costing me some $100 to $120 a month before I quit cold turkey, mainly because I lost my job. isn't that funny? Most addicts just get deeper and deeper in to their addiction when their life starts to fall apart; I gave up my addiction completely.
Well, for the most part I gave it up. I still allowed myself the once-a-year binge that would leave my high and sore for WEEKS before I'd come down, but that was perfectly acceptable on a social level. And I wasn't doing any of the hard-core mainstream stuff, either. I was nickle-and-dimeing it all the way. I felt that i could handle it, and since the memories and the excitement would last me till next years binge, why not?
But then I found out that The Governent was GIVING IT AWAY. Like, all you had to do was go in to their offices, fill out a form and BANG! All the junk you could ever want, all available to you just for asking. I went kinda nuts. I started trying pretty much everything I had heard of over that two years of clean-and-sober HELL that I could get my hands on. I'll admit that I had a few bad trips, but over all it was HEAVEN.
I'd even take my kid there with me and let her watch as I did it. I've even tried to get HER in to it as well. God help me...
I started going to see my old dealers again. "Just to keep in touch"... you know how it is. Joined a bunch of on-line comunities where they talk about the stuff all the time, saying "You gotta try this, man! It's WICKED!"
I started itching for the hard stuff again. The stuff that "The Man" was supplying me with was great and it was free, but the call of Wednesday Afternoon was just too alluring. I started hiding money from my wife so that I could go and buy stuff without her knowing. I know that she'd be okay with it and she'd be supportive, but... I'm ashamed. I can't look her in the eyes and admit to her that I've completely relapsed.
I don't know how much longer I can keep up the charade... at least till DC's Wednesday Comics is done with it's 12 issues, I hope. But then I picked up Adventure Comics #1 today and WOW can Geoff Johns write a good book! I AM SO HOPELESSLY HOOKED!
Spent $14 on brand stinkin' new comic books today, with money that I've secreted away for MONTHS. Running low on funds now... soon I'll have to come out of the closet and let my wife know. I'll have to get support for my habit somewhere... maybe turn a few tricks on Ebay, sell that run of early Silver Surfer issues to get my kicks... I just don't know.
Advertisement for the new Doom Patrol featuring Metal Men (written by Keith Giffen) has me jonesing. I... I need help. Before this goes too far.
Well, for the most part I gave it up. I still allowed myself the once-a-year binge that would leave my high and sore for WEEKS before I'd come down, but that was perfectly acceptable on a social level. And I wasn't doing any of the hard-core mainstream stuff, either. I was nickle-and-dimeing it all the way. I felt that i could handle it, and since the memories and the excitement would last me till next years binge, why not?
But then I found out that The Governent was GIVING IT AWAY. Like, all you had to do was go in to their offices, fill out a form and BANG! All the junk you could ever want, all available to you just for asking. I went kinda nuts. I started trying pretty much everything I had heard of over that two years of clean-and-sober HELL that I could get my hands on. I'll admit that I had a few bad trips, but over all it was HEAVEN.
I'd even take my kid there with me and let her watch as I did it. I've even tried to get HER in to it as well. God help me...
I started going to see my old dealers again. "Just to keep in touch"... you know how it is. Joined a bunch of on-line comunities where they talk about the stuff all the time, saying "You gotta try this, man! It's WICKED!"
I started itching for the hard stuff again. The stuff that "The Man" was supplying me with was great and it was free, but the call of Wednesday Afternoon was just too alluring. I started hiding money from my wife so that I could go and buy stuff without her knowing. I know that she'd be okay with it and she'd be supportive, but... I'm ashamed. I can't look her in the eyes and admit to her that I've completely relapsed.
I don't know how much longer I can keep up the charade... at least till DC's Wednesday Comics is done with it's 12 issues, I hope. But then I picked up Adventure Comics #1 today and WOW can Geoff Johns write a good book! I AM SO HOPELESSLY HOOKED!
Spent $14 on brand stinkin' new comic books today, with money that I've secreted away for MONTHS. Running low on funds now... soon I'll have to come out of the closet and let my wife know. I'll have to get support for my habit somewhere... maybe turn a few tricks on Ebay, sell that run of early Silver Surfer issues to get my kicks... I just don't know.
Advertisement for the new Doom Patrol featuring Metal Men (written by Keith Giffen) has me jonesing. I... I need help. Before this goes too far.
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no subject
Date: 2009-08-14 01:31 am (UTC)This was a good writeup, by the way.
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Date: 2009-08-14 01:44 am (UTC)Digital Comics just don't do it for me. Can't drag my PC in to the crapper with me, and too costly to use my laptop as "Emergency TP" like I can do with a comic book. There is NOTHING so satisfying as a bowel movement accompanied by the tactile experience of a comic book :)
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Date: 2009-08-16 03:07 am (UTC)