captain_slinky | Bolstering My Suspension

Molly's current Cinematic Obsession is "Hotel Transylvania". It's not as horrible as I had expected an Adam Sandler Kids Film would be. Dracula as a single Dad, raising a teenage vampire girl, running a hotel for Monsters. It's funny, it's sweet, it's remarkably non-insulting... but I have a problem with it.

The story implies that Dracula had a baby with a Vampire Lady who was then killed by a mob of Angry Villagers. Dracula then raised the Vampire Baby, from INFANCY (complete with adorable baby, toddler and little-kid vampire grow-up montage back story bits where she first learns to turn in to a bat, learns to climb walls, etc) to the ripe old age of one-hundred-eighteen years old, where she is finally old enough to leave the Castle/Hotel.

She LOOKS 18 years old.

Accepted Vampire mythology states two things that make this an impossibility. FIRST, Vampires can't make babies and SECOND, you "freeze" looking whatever you age you were when you were first turned in to a vampire.

I am willing to suspend my disbelief, but this chronal irregularity MUST be solved first!

If her aging is just decelerated so that she doesn't look 18 till she's 118, that means that Vampires are developmentally challenged. What regular humans would have been around for 40 years and still talk like a toddler?

If she aged at normal speed and then "froze" at 18, then she's been hanging around the castle/hotel for A HUNDRED YEARS with all these teenage emotions and longings bottling up, with no reasoning behind her getting to leave at age 118.

SO HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!?!?!