captain_slinky | Dungeons & Dragons &Saviors & Pariahs

If there is a God, your standard Western Religion Capital-G "God", your White Beardy Guy Who Lives In The Clouds And Gives You A Wings-N-Harp Combo Set When You Die *GOD*, I think he feels like a Dungeon Master who spent MONTHS making a great home-brew adventure only to have his players just not get it and take the whole game off the rails, and they keep making the right saving throws to just keep it going.

GOD: "You find yourselves on a beautiful island full of life and energy. Energy beams down from the sky in the form of sunbeams! Wind provides it's own form of endless energy just waiting to be harnessed! Mighty rivers flow wildly just waiting to be tamed! It's up to you to find a way to harvest this energy and -"
ROGUE: Okay, I dig up some dinosaur bones and set them on fire for energy.
GOD: Wait, what?
ROGUE: I dig up some old dinosaur bones and set them on fire for energy! There's got to be TONS of them lying around, right?
GOD: Yeah, but... I mean, Rivers! Sunshine! WIND! It's all right there and ready for you! You just need to -
ROGUE: What do I need to roll?
GOD: *SIGH* FINE. Roll percentile, you need to roll a natural 99-percent or better.
ROGUE: WOO HOO 100-PERCENT!
GOD: *Siiiiiiiiiigh*

GOD: Okay, this island is also teeming with food ready for the gathering. Fruits and vegetables all around, and plenty of fresh water to -
FIGHTER: I ATTACK IT WITH MY BROADSWORD!
ROGUE: And I wash off my flaming dinosaur bones in the water!
GOD: *siiiiiiiiigh*