026 - Doctors
Jan. 26th, 2015 11:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
captain_slinkyI have had exactly *one* Doctor in my adult life that I liked, and I had to give up going to see him because he was never there - his "Hobby" of Bird Watching took up about 80% of his time, and he was more well known for his books and photography of birds than he was for his medical practice. But when he WAS in the office and I *did* see him, he was incredible. He swore like a sailor and always got directly to the point, all while making you feel like you had just had a casual conversation with some random dude in a bar that seemed to remember more about you than you did about him.
My current doctor is *nice*... somewhat timmid, and she'll do whatever I tell her to do, but she has no... intuition, I guess? When I go to see her, the first thing she does is open up a step-by-step questionnaire on her computer and asks me a series of questions that will either tell us how to treat my symptoms, or tell me which Game Of Thrones character I am most like.
She *always* seems surprised with whatever diagnosis/treatment the computer spits out, and she often has trouble pronouncing the medications she's prescribing. I most times leave her office thinking "Well heck, I could have done THAT from my own home if I had access to that questionnaire"
The good/bad of this is that I can usually just call the doctor's office and answer the questions over the phone so she can tell me if I need to come in and get a referral to a different doctor? I think that's good?
"MISTER PIERCE! How the hell you doin'? Didja have a chance to look over my new Calendar? Yeah, Marsh Birds of Northern Canada! Can you f*ckin' believe it? Beautiful birds. So anyways, how's your leg? Still f*cked up? Uh huh... and you're still wearing the brace, right? Don't you f*ckin' LIE to me, I'll know! Let me take a look... Mmm hm. Okay, how about if I put pressure here? And here? Okay, aaaand... here. Oh yeah, THERE'S the f*cker! Okay, here's what we're going to do! I'm gonna keep you on those meds for like another week. Keep using the brace. After a week, drop the meds but keep using the brace. Okay? Good... now, let me look at your f*ckin' head, you sound all stuffed-up"
My current doctor is *nice*... somewhat timmid, and she'll do whatever I tell her to do, but she has no... intuition, I guess? When I go to see her, the first thing she does is open up a step-by-step questionnaire on her computer and asks me a series of questions that will either tell us how to treat my symptoms, or tell me which Game Of Thrones character I am most like.
She *always* seems surprised with whatever diagnosis/treatment the computer spits out, and she often has trouble pronouncing the medications she's prescribing. I most times leave her office thinking "Well heck, I could have done THAT from my own home if I had access to that questionnaire"
The good/bad of this is that I can usually just call the doctor's office and answer the questions over the phone so she can tell me if I need to come in and get a referral to a different doctor? I think that's good?
