DISNEY INC. MUST BE STOPPED!!!

[captain_slinky]

I think it all started with "Beauty & The Beast's Enchanted Christmas". Soon after came "Aladin: The Return of Jafar". See, I'm okay with the "Dineyfication" of the classics. You want Quazimodo to have a beautiful voice and wacky animate gargoyles for friends? Go ahead. You want Cinderella to have a bunch of lovable talking vermin help her get to the ball? Go ahead. Wise-talking, skat-singing animals in The Jungle Book, a wacky-yet-wise cricket to be pinochio's constant sidekick instead of just being a two-sceene character, and terribley butchered cockney accents to Marry Poppins? I'm cool with that. But these SEQUELS HAVE TO STOP!!! Right now, Disney has sequels to Hunchback of Notredam, Peter Pan, and now CINDERELLA, ALL AT THE SAME TIME!!!

Good thing they had those olympic-class gymnastic parelell bars installed in Walt's grave... they must come in handy for all the flipping and turning in his grave that he must be doing.

Comments

Re:

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

Ahh, yes... "LADY AND THE TRAMP II: TRAMP HARDER". Because the first movie left so many unanswered questions.

Okay, I'm gonna need you to get me a pair of pliers, 14 feet of high-tension copper wire, a car battery, Emanuel Lewis, and Michael Isener's home address. I think I have a plan for how to finally stop the madness.

[collisions.livejournal.com]

I may have spotted a flaw in your plan...how are you going to properly channel all the EM radiation up the proper orifice without using a crowbar? I mean, I have a crowbar if you need to borrow it. In fact, depending on how it's used, you don't even have to return it.

Aaanyway. If you're some Vice President of Bringing In Shit-tons More Cash at Disney just sitting around your office trying to think of some way to bring in shit-tons more cash and your gaze alights on that copy of, I dunno, Fantasia, or Cinderella, or Lady and the Tramp, or any of the other zillion Disney classics on your bookshelf, what are you gonna do? I once read something in which the author described the phenomenon by pointing out examples like Titanic, wherein the horrible tragedy wasn't powerful enough without a nice love story going on. He said it was "like giving Anne Frank a wacky roommate."

Me, I'm waiting for Secret of Nimh 4: More Cute Fuzzy Shit.

[opaleyes.livejournal.com]

Count me in, and while we're at it, let's put a stop to all of those AWFUL Land Before Time sequels. What is that? Making them musicals no less! No no NO! And what number are they on now? It's not the Land Before Time anymore. It's the land where people are wishing time would end so they could die and not have to live with these sequels anymore.

[captain-slinky.livejournal.com]

Didn't the last Land Before Time movie take place in 1920's depression-era New York?

Re:

[opaleyes.livejournal.com]

Probably. Oy vey.